I lost a Netflix movie that I wanted to watch. Sometime in between driving back from the pool with a crabby teenager, driving another one to an appointment, and listening to Don't Trust Me 3oh!3 for the 85th time this week in my 120 degree car, I lost a movie in that big red envelope in comes in. It was sitting on the table in the dining room and then IT WAS GONE and I know that I picked it up and became delirious from the heat and picked up something else and put that away and then forgot that I had the movie in my hand and left it somewhere really stupid.
I've looked in the couch, under the microwave, through my pile of bills,
Under the table cloth, on my bed, under the bathroom sink.
I've opened the refrigerator and looked in the vegetable drawer.
I looked through the box of popsicles in the freezer and through the clean laundry in the basket in my room,
Behind the television, in Haley's room, and in the box full of rechargeable batteries.
I called the kids at the houses they were hanging out at and asked them,
But they just thought I'd lost my mind.
And perhaps I had.
It was about the time that I slid off my chair.
Which happened right after I wrote that awful post today that's still not funny.
I looked through the magazines on the table thinking maybe I'd used it as a bookmark,
and in the hall closet where I shoved the vacuum, and in the trash can for recyclable paper.
I opened the front door to look on the steps, and in my bookcase,
but I forgot to look behind the toilet. I'll bet it's behind the damn toilet!